Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Pretty Pretty Pulp Posters

There's been some yearning in the Asian web communities (I don't mean spider-people co-ops) for crazy movie posters to pass the time between shrink wrapping their uncles, and dinner. I trace it back to the moment people laid eyes on this steaming hunk of mustachioed courage:
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The glory held within this magnificent depiction of a man overcoming the obstacles of puberty and poverty is unmatched in any timezone. Including the Quicken Loans Arena warp zone.

I hereby demand more of the pulpin' art, made in a basement whilst singing into a tiger's paw. Most of these are Asian (Pakistan and India are located in Asia, look it up)
Here goes muffins:


Bursting with fruity flavor!
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Pakistani
men are NOT jump ropes, ALF-bodied double trucker monster.
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I remember when I used to rub Orajel on my crotch in between classes during high school. Sometimes I didn't even know I had a boner until I looked down. I was too busy gettin' my numb on.
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Whose blood? Why green? Where snake tail? How dress stay on? Where kneecaps? Nice sandals.
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Damn, son! He cut your fucking face in half with a gun, bitch! You just gonna take that? Crank call that muffucka's Aunt Rita, dawg! Leave that slut a quadruple voicemail!
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Arm-puller-offers and Demon Grover star in this majestic street musical about sticky knives and mayonnaise sandwiches
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Minus the dearth of vowels, this poster has it all
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I wanna meet Luther Vandross' dad. I bet he has three voice boxes and a double toenail.
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Lions, guns, and helicopters. Sounds like my bar-mitzvah. Heyyo!
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All I ever wanted, as a child, was a Yeti to play with me in my backyard. I had a few visitors in my days back there. First came the ducks. Then turtles, geese, deer, schoolchildren, Tampico vendors, and Grandpa Zap! But a Yeti never made an appearance. I'd like to think that he wanted to show me his forest lair, only he was too busy with bills and whittling. But a Yeti doesn't give a shit about me. I'm cool with it now, but back when I was 8, I couldn't even look at my Lunchables without bursting into tears.
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Most of these found at:
Bibi's Box
The Hotspot Online
Desi Hot Masala

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